"Put yourself out there" is one of those phrases that sounds useful until you try to act on it.
Out where? Doing what? With who? And for how long before it stops feeling like a strange audition for friendship?
If you want to meet new people but hate the idea of networking, start somewhere more ordinary: choose something you would genuinely enjoy doing, and do it around other people more than once.
Start with the activity
Meeting people is easier when meeting people is not the only point.
Choose an activity you would still value even if you did not come away with a new mate on day one. Walking, music, sport, cooking, volunteering, learning a skill, helping with a community project, outdoor activities, practical courses, retreats, local groups. The exact thing matters less than whether you will actually go back.
This takes pressure off the social side.
You have a reason to be there. So does everyone else. There is something to talk about that is not just who you are, what you do and why you have appeared in the room.
That is a much easier place to begin.
Recurring beats one-off
One-off events can be enjoyable, but they often do not give connection enough time to grow.
You can have a good conversation, swap a few details and still never speak again. Life is busy. People forget. Nobody quite wants to be the one who follows up.
Recurring settings solve some of that.
If you see the same people every week, fortnight or month, the awkwardness drops. You recognise faces. Conversations continue. Someone remembers your name. You start to become part of the furniture in a good way.
Friendship usually needs repeated contact before it feels natural.
Look for smaller groups
Big events can be energising, but they can also make it easy to disappear.
Smaller groups often work better if you actually want to get to know people. There is less performance, less noise and more chance of speaking to the same person for more than three minutes.
That might mean a small walking group rather than a huge meetup, a local class rather than a conference, a volunteering team rather than a public event, or a retreat where the group spends proper time together.
Small groups also make it easier to turn up alone.
You do not have to break into a crowd. You just have to arrive, take part and let familiarity build.
Choose cooperation over performance
Some environments quietly encourage comparison.
Who has the best job? Who knows the most people? Who looks most confident? Who has the sharpest story about themselves?
If that is what you dislike about networking, choose settings where people cooperate instead.
Cooking a meal, navigating a walk, helping on a project, learning something practical, taking on a group challenge or volunteering for something useful gives people a shared job. That changes the tone.
You see how people behave, not just how they introduce themselves.
That is usually a better basis for connection.
Go alone without making it a big deal
Turning up alone can feel exposed for the first few minutes.
That does not mean it is a mistake. Most people are more focused on themselves than on judging you. Some will be relieved to see someone else arriving solo.
Make it easier by choosing something with structure. A start time, a host, a planned activity, a route, a task or a group meal all give you something to join without having to invent the whole evening yourself.
If you are nervous, set a simple aim: turn up, stay for the thing, speak to one person.
That is enough for a first attempt.
Follow the thread afterwards
Meeting people is only the beginning.
If you get on with someone, give the connection a small next step. Suggest doing the activity again. Send the link you mentioned. Ask if they are going to the next one. Invite them along to something similar.
Keep it light and specific.
"Good to meet you earlier. I'm thinking of going back next month if you fancy it."
That is not networking. That is just following a thread that already exists.
Over time, those small follow-ups are what turn familiar faces into actual people in your life.
You do not need to become a professional socialiser. You just need repeatable places, shared activity and enough willingness to go back.
Published: 24 September 2026